Daughter #1 arrived back in Texas rather unexpectedly. We had tried so hard to convince her that staying in California was the best thing for her to do, seeing that she wasn't going to be able to bring her daughter here. I guess we were trying the tough love approach, hoping that somehow it would sink in and have a positive effect on the rest of her life. We explained that she didn't need to go to school this semester, she could just work and get to know her daughter better. We explained that she could go to any one of a thousand schools in California, that they would welcome her and her GI bill money into their school.
What made the arrival even more shocking was that she had been here already for almost a week before she appeared at the door. There was no hi or hello, no apology or explanation, but just an "I'm here to pick up my stuff" kind of attitude. Really all she could say was that she had told "Daddy" that she was going to come. Of course she forgot the part where he told her that it wasn't a good idea and that we couldn't support her if she came.
So she's here, but not in communication with us. She's here and living with a neighbor's cousin. She's here, but it's as though she isn't here. Except that our granddaughter has lost her mother. Precious little girl knows that she has a mother, but her mother has never taken care of her, never taken her home, never been a 24/7, 365 days a year kind of mother. It goes against everything that I ever believed about having a child or being a mom. But then I have to face the music, that I am not in charge and my daughter is an adult who is making her own decisions. It hurts really badly when I think about it too much, so I have to lay it aside and think that Precious Girl's Nana( her other grandmother) loves her and takes care of her and supports her like a mom should and maybe that's OK.
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